Why can’t I leave it alone?

What can I say, we all have had our first crush. My first crush was a boy in Kindergarden or grade one. Such a cutie he was. You wouldn’t think being that young, that you would be thinking the way I was. It is actually very disturbing to me.

This is where I really want to remember what I can’t remember. If you understand what I mean? It is with that heavy heart feeling that I know something more has happened to me. I just cannot seem to dig it out. Even writing this I started having intrusive thoughts.

Breath, Refocus, positive thoughts. I am in the now and I know the past is the past but there is still a lot of trauma that I need to work through. Figuring out what it is, is the tricky part. Open minded, Accepting, why can’t I just leave it alone?

Healing is probably the best choice I have ever made in my life. Am I tired, Absolutely but a very good tired. Sometimes it is hard to sleep because I want to enjoy every moment now. It is a very good feeling.

To anyone who is struggling with Alcohol and Addiction, It may seem impossible but I am telling you it is possible. You need to have that faith. Faith that you can overcome those things. You will see what you can accomplish by just sitting in a moment, feeling, emotion. Let it flow. “Flow like a river”

Stay Shining

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